Review: The Many Faces of God - an Exhibit by Beatrice Valentine

  3/5 stars.

  What can be said about Beatrice Valentine that she hasn't already said? She's been an artist, amateur filmmaker, musician, poet, and most recently a curator.

  Beatrice Valentine has made a career out of her blunt, quirky, and somewhat relatable personality that has grown to achieve an almost cult-like status.

  When I received an invitation to The Many Faces of God, I was over-the-moon. This was THE Beatrice Valentine. Even still, at 74 years old, she commands a presence that forces you to be still, listen, and absorb.

  You hear her voice the second you enter the museum. Not her actual voice, but a well-timed hologram that talks about her life. Specifically, her hologram narrates short yarns from her childhood and early religious upbringing.

  If the exhibit ended here, I'd be content. I could talk about Beatrice all day. I love Beatrice.

  I just wish the rest of the exhibit held my attention the same way. If you're lucky, you can catch Beatrice herself leading groups of people through her exhibit with such gusto that the content itself doesn't matter.

  Unfortunately, the content itself was boring. Even with Beatrice leading the charge through the different gallery pieces, the stories lacked an overall purpose or journey for me.

  The opening section, called Early Man, focuses heavily on animism. I get it. I think we all paid attention in school. Animism is the belief that all things, including rocks have a spirit or soul.

  Let me tell you, after seven rocks, I GET IT.

  I may need to retract my statement above. When I said I could listen to Beatrice talk about anything, I meant to exclude rocks.

  There were some nice paintings and representations of shadows and different lights that were included in this section. It was interesting to consider how early people assumed everything had a meaning. Everything needed to fit a certain pattern.

  I still feel like the Early Man section could have been much, much smaller.

  This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.

  The exhibit then moves towards various artistic representations of gods as they slowly evolve from rocks into colorful statues. It's barely noticeable at first, but eventually you realize you're looking at pictures of golden deities instead of mushroom-shaped rocks.

  I do enjoy hearing a good mythological epic, and Beatrice's ability to find obscure legends was another delight.

  I, along with a few other patrons did find it strange that the smallest part of this exhibit came after. This section, named the Monotheistic Man was incredibly short.

  I suppose this was a creative decision on Beatrice's part, since it was adorned with the following banner: "What else can I say about these Abrahamic beliefs that haven't already been shoved down our throats?"

  It seemed like an interesting creative choice, but Beatrice has made a career out of her atheism, so it's no surprise that her disdain for organized religion crept its way into her exhibit.

  The last section, titled: Technological Gods was very much on the nose. It's exactly what you would expect it to be. Trust me. Phones and technology, AI and man. I hate that I wasn't shocked by any of it.

  There was one interesting send-off for the exhibit, that I will give credit to Beatrice Valentine for. At the very end, there's another Beatrice hologram standing next to a black door.

  There's two words written on this door in red ink that are so small, you can only see it when you approach it. It says: “The Singularity”.

  Now to really play up the drama, you're warned by the hologram that once you go through that door, there's no going back.

  I won't spoil it since I don't want to ruin the fun, but I saw some people actually refrain from going through the door!

  All in all, if this show was presented by anyone other than Beatrice Valentine, I would have rated it 1/5 Stars, but come on, it's Beatrice Valentine! Getting the Beatty experience by itself is worth it, trust me.

  - To Beatty, from your favorite Astronaut

  P.S. I hope this doesn’t go too hard and that I read the room right. You know my real rating was always going to be 5/5.