My mind swam with the influx of information that had just been broadcast into my brain.

  I was trying to keep up with it all while my heart was doing its best to break each and every one of my ribs. I could feel a strong wave of overwhelm coming on like a blanket made from cattle prods.

  There is no way any of this was real. How was any of this possible? Was I dreaming? I was going to be so pissed if this was all some sort of dumb simulation.

  Of course, we understand that this is quite a lot of information. A version of this helpful guide will be included in your book under the helpful table heading of ‘Help – I am Trapped in a Game World’.

  You will also find other helpful information in there such as: ‘What to do if I Am on Fire?’ and ‘How Contagious is a Zombie Bite?’

  We just want you to know that we are here to help!

  Some of you will have noticed that this placard is being broadcast directly into your vision and is not actually a projection.

  This is just one of the many ways that we are using neural implants to increase your experience here. You may also notice that these words appear in a language you are most comfortable with and in a way that feels familiar and friendly to you.

  Isn’t technology amazing!

  While we are on the subject, let’s go over a few items inside your neural menus. In the upper right hand corner of this tooltip you will see a small box with an ‘x’ inside. We ask that you –

  The tooltip closed on its own. Or at least it appeared to be on its own. It had closed when I had moved my vision over to the small box and had thought about the ‘x’ that was inside it. I guess this was how you affected the menus.

  Vaguely I noticed the pedestal it had mentioned before with the book on it. How did that get there? The placard returned, interrupting that train of thought.

  We aren’t really sure what we expected. This happens every time. Please do not close this menu.

  We are sure it has become apparent, there are certain ways to interact with these menus using certain thought patterns. We urge you to please not close –

  The menu closed again. This was going to be really difficult to navigate if the menus were going to be this tricky. The fact that I was even worried about the menus at this point told me how far into the weeds I was with all of this.

  One second, they are talking about us being trapped here, and another they are talking about creatures trying to murder us. Oh, AND that there apparently were going to be zombies.

  Now I’m worried about the design of this insane brain menu that some galactic entity implanted into my skull so it could communicate with me. In a game world. I was becoming strangely invested in what the messages were displaying.

  The screen popped back up. The tone of the message seemed to change, and I found myself slightly amused but mostly irritated. And confused.

  Ok seriously, there’s a lot to go over, please stop doing that!

  There was another long pause as if daring me to do it again.

  As we were saying.

  These menus act differently than the menus offered in your new book. As I go over a few of them, you will see different components pop up on the edges of your vision. Do not be alarmed! These are the least of your problems.

  “What the fuck?” I said out loud.

  The last sentence seemed to scramble and was replaced with the words: “These will make sense over time!” I wasn’t fully convinced I hadn’t just imagined the whole thing.

  These components are designed to work with your vision type and will be more useful when you can interact with them. Please do not try to do so now, they have not been activated.

  Another pause. I blinked, realizing that looking at the words was causing me a little bit of eye strain. Was it waiting for me to say something? The tooltip changed as if answering my question.

  What you will notice next is that down near the bottom of your vision is a long bar filled with red. This is your health bar. We even used your very own real blood to fill that bar up!

  We really are all about efficiency!

  To the left of that is your stamina. Typically, human stamina is measured internally by how well you can keep the pace you are going using your organs, oxygen, blood and so on.

  A depletion of certain mechanisms begins to make breathing, and even moving, more and more difficult. This will still happen but now there is also a handy gauge that will go up and down depending on how out of breath you are!

  These items began to populate inside my vision and it was so surreal I was feeling a little woozy from it. There was a slight buzz inside my head each time it happened. It reminded me of brain zaps I would get whenever I came off my anti-anxiety meds.

  The health bar was a thin red line that seemed to be the size of a standard number two pencil. It went to the left and right across the lower center part of my vision. It stopped with just enough room on the left for my stamina.

  The stamina was depicted as a bowl shape with yellow fluid inside it. When I wasn’t focused on them, they were fuzzy and blurry which allowed me to mostly see through them.

  Unauthorized use: this story is on Amazon without permission from the author. Report any sightings.

  When I focused on trying to look at them they became larger, more opaque and easier to see. If I stayed focused on either my health or my stamina numbers appeared to be overlaid in the middle of each.

  My health showed 100/100 and my stamina showed 98% which I thought was odd. The effect was absolutely bizarre, and I had to try this out a few times before I could get a feel for it.

  There was going to be a learning curve to this and having little bits of stuff just outside my vision was going to take time to get used to.

  It seemed like the system was pausing to allow me to get used to the interface. The parts of me that had been freaking out were still doing so but felt muted while I tried to follow along.

  To the top of your health bar you will see a series of 8 boxes all connected in a line. These will be populated with helpful items you will discover later on throughout the session.

  These boxes are what you would call a ‘hotbar’ or a ‘quickbar’ (we don’t care which one you use) and will allow you instance access to whatever is stored there.

  These items still take up an inventory slot but do not require you to open the inventory in order for you to use them. To the right of your health bar you will see a series of two smaller boxes.

  These are for your healing items that you will need later on as different events cause your health bar to deplete. The items stored here do NOT take up an inventory space and can be stacked.

  There was a buzzing in the base of my brain again and shortly after there was what looked like a dirty rolled-up bandage in one of the boxes. Focusing on it brought up the same type of numbers from before only this time it also gave me a tooltip that told me it was ‘low grade gauze’.

  There was a small icon next to the words and when I focused on that it expanded the description of the item:

  Low Grade Gauze

  Uses: 2/10

  Common

  Crafting: Not Learned

  This low-grade healing item is used for, well, healing - though by appearances it could also come with a case of hepatitis! Hopefully your shots are all up to date!

  Provides a small portion of health between 2 and 15 points. This item can be used to stop superficial bleeding but will be ineffective against larger wounds that require High Grade Gauze or greater.

  This item will not provide health above max health level. This item does not provide continued healing or mending.

  (Note, this item does not actually have a chance to give you hepatitis. It does have a 10% chance to fail and become unusable due to the low-grade craftsmanship of the item.)

  I closed the description and was able to look at the gauze again without the tooltip popping up. It was getting easier to navigate the menus but still felt weird.

  Great! You have discovered how to expand a description! You may have noticed there is no way to activate the gauze item at this time – which is by design!

  We wouldn’t want you to accidentally use something as important as healing when you will be taking damage soon.

  One thing of note: you can use this item if you have only lost 1 point of health so be careful! Now let’s see you put what you have learned into action!

  I didn’t understand what it was saying about taking damage soon. Was it just speaking globally, like I would be taking damage eventually?

  Suddenly, I felt pressure build in the air near me like someone had closed a door in a room without windows open. This seemed to occupy a roughly two foot by two foot space fairly close to me.

  As I looked in that direction, I could see the air warping inward where the pressure was. There was a sound like someone tearing sheets of paper and my skin tingled a bit like it had before being sucked up into the space ship.

  With a ‘whump’ a creature suddenly appeared next to me and I screamed. I tried to leap away from the thing but I was glued to the spot somehow.

  The creature stood about 2 feet high with speckled red and grey skin. The thing’s head was too big for its body and was a wide oval like a football.

  Its ears were large and sat out to the sides, adding to the oblong effect. There were little clumps of hair in splotches on its mostly bald scalp.

  It had massive yellow eyes that were squinted as it looked up at me with obvious malice. They looked like the eyes of someone experiencing jaundice with an odd glow to them. They sat above a much too small nose that seemed pinched.

  The creature was thinly limbed with sinewy muscles and odd, oversized joints. Its forearms were more muscular than its biceps, almost like Popeye the Sailer Man.

  Its legs were similar in ratio to its arms, with the calves being almost the same size at its thighs. Its bare feet were overly large as well and covered in filth and dirt.

  It wore tattered leather around its waist with bits of it around its wrists and neck like some sort of makeshift armor. It had a necklace made from what looked like bones looped through a dirty leather cord that hung over the top of its leather scarf.

  The entire thing was covered in something disgusting and smelled exactly like cat shit. Not sort of like it, but the actual and very real smell of fresh cat shit.

  I took all of this in quickly, but everything seemed to stand still when I saw the knife in its right hand. Well, it was a small knife to me but to this creature it was almost a broadsword.

  The thing's ears shot back behind its head just like a cat’s would and it growled. It was also stuck in place, but it still tried to lunge at me. Well, most of it was stuck, the upper half seemed to move just fine as it flailed.

  It began hissing at me, revealing a mouth as wide as its weird head and contained an absolutely absurd amount of sharp, tiny teeth. My eyes widened with fear and a description box popped up:

  Goblin (Darkside)

  Tribe: Unknown

  Affiliation: Unknown

  Status: Unknown

  This is a standard goblin. They are small, travel in packs, and somehow always smell like a well used litter box. They are tribal and extremely loyal but also lack intelligence, making them easily confused and easily offended.

  No one is sure how their leaders are chosen but everyone is pretty sure they don’t stay one for long. Goblins have different subtypes depending on where they are born and what their original tribe was.

  (Note, typically we don’t overshare like this but since it’s your first time you should know that they carry an incredible number of diseases in their mouths. Like just a full set of contamination daggers in there.

  Oftentimes, it’s not the force of their bite or their knives or their claws that get you - it’s the needle exchange living inside their faces that do.)

  (Additional Note: If bitten or scratched there is a small chance it will inflict a gangrene debuff and/or rabid debuff as a bonus.)

  “Well that’s fucking terrifying,” I said out loud, regarding the creature warily.

  The description had included a crude drawing of a goblin bust, but I didn’t think it did the thing justice. I was thankful it was held in place but also confused by its purpose here.

  The thing was absolutely losing its mind trying to break free from its invisible bonds to get at me. Its little knife didn’t look super sharp but the row upon row of disease ridden teeth had me all sorts of freaked out. I looked around the room trying to figure out what was about to happen.

  “What is this thing doing here?” I asked.

  This is Jubjub. He is here to help you test out your new healing bandage.

  And that’s when the little shit got free and stabbed me.