By the time Keylynn walked into the office, it was mostly empty. No one works late on a Friday if they can help it. There were a couple of people who ignored her as she walked by, working on their computers. She was going to need an office hot beverage, coffee, to get herself in the work mindset so she can finish her report. She wanted to draft the exclusivity rights agreement for the guild to ensure Cleatus gets what he wants out of it.

  She knew she was just finding ways to avoid Tiv, because if she saw her, her dirt nap invite would taunt them both. She can’t just invite Tiv over to her dwelling. If things didn’t go well, their friendship could be ruined, and Keylynn really likes her coffee and spiralled cinnamon pastries.

  It’s not like she can ask Gwen for help. Gwen would say nonsense things like ‘She’s not worth it then,’ or ‘What’s the worst that could happen?’ or ‘Just shower her in endless flowers.’ Gwen is knowledgeable about many things, but this wasn’t one of them. And she can’t even fathom the idea of asking Dauven or Riv for help.

  “Keylynn!” Riv squeaked from her feet, causing her to jump. A slug mushroom wobbled against her neck but held firm.

  She looked down, seeing Riv sipping his coffee cup frantically trying to stop it from spilling on the ground. She gingerly touched her face. Didn’t she have a slug mushroom on her cheek?

  “I know I’m short and all, but you normally don’t mow me over,” he squeaked, annoyed. There was a damp spot on his robes.

  “My deepest apologies, I was trapped in my thoughts. Are you harmed?” She bit her lip; she should really tell him about the potential of drinking slug slime mould. She didn’t know how it would affect the taste of the coffee. At least it didn’t freeze his coffee.

  “I appear to have survived in one piece.” He patted himself down with his free hand. “So what’s got you so deep in thought? Your coffee empire?”

  She frowned at him. What did he mean by her coffee empire? “I have a quandary that I seem to have found myself in. I think I know what I want to do. It’s just a matter of convincing myself that that’s the path I will take,” she tried her best to explain. Her interpersonal problems were not something she’s ever really discussed with the young gnome. He was endlessly smart when it comes to magic and always willing to help her, but it felt strange to ask him for help with her problems. In many ways he was still a child.

  He nodded and sipped his coffee. She held her breath waiting for a reaction, but none came. Maybe she didn’t lose a slug mushroom in his coffee after all.

  “Well, all in all, you have to trust yourself; only you know which option you won’t regret doing.” He paused to sip his coffee again. “One regret you will have is trying to sabotage my coffee! What are you thinking, dropping your fungi into one of my wakefulness brews? They don’t react the same as coffee, and you changed my Red Eye See-God-or-Become-One level brew to a standard cup of coffee!” He stomped his foot like a child having a tantrum.

  “I knew you excluded me from your coffee empire on purpose! You’re jealous of my many brews with their clever names, including Mushroom’s Taint! You started a coffee empire to defeat my brews even though we all know they are more effective than any cup of coffee could ever be!” He threw his coffee on the ground. At least the office slimes will thank him for his donation. “If I discover you selling my concoctions, you will rue this day!”

  She raised an eyebrow, concerned. He must be extremely sleep deprived. As amazing as his brews can be, they often lead to adverse reactions to the lacking of real sleep. She crouched so he could look in her eyes, as eye contact usually helps him see reason. “I don’t know why you are suddenly so cross with me, Riv. I don’t have a coffee empire, nor would I ever sell your brews without you.” Not that she thinks anyone should sell them at all. They were simply a power that not everyone can handle.

  “Don’t lie,” he scowled at her. “The Cup Stop. It has you written all over it, from the cute name with the play on words you are known for. It’s subtle, but it’s there. There are mushrooms everywhere in the merchandise and the menu! You even offer a mushroom discount! And don’t you think I missed the mushroom-shaped donuts? You know I love donuts! And to think Gwen would have baked them for you. All you had to do was ask!” His voice reminded her of one of Gwen’s squeaky toys that she was chewing on rapidly. He hasn’t slept in well over a week. A week was his limit. Anything beyond that and he became unreasonable.

  She rested a hand gently on his shoulder, urging her hyphae to grow the soothing and fragrant Winter’s Kiss mushroom. Its aroma and spores are known to have a calming effect.

  “You have a misunderstanding. The Cup Stop was an established business that I found, and we entered a mutually beneficial agreement so that she can sell coffee to the office while our break room is closed.” The gentle, white, translucent, thin mushrooms blossomed on his shoulder. They have long stalks so that their spores can be released into a breeze and spread.

  He brushed her hand off his shoulder. Luckily most of the Winter’s Kiss remained on his shoulder. “I know your mushroom witchcraft ways, and don’t even try it! I read through your financial records; I know the truth,” he hissed.

  “Then you already know that I don’t own or run a coffee empire. If I did, would I retain my employment here?” She hoped logic would help him see reason. The last thing she can do is tell him to sleep. When he’s like this, sleeping has to be his idea, like a cat or a cranky child.

  “Why wouldn’t you? Everyone knows we stop being friends the moment we stop working together.”

  Understanding dawned on her. He wasn’t angry about her nonexistent coffee empire; he was cross because he feels as if he’s being left behind. She has been a terrible friend since their promotion. She’s been so focused on her team leadership program and her new team that her friends have been neglected. All of her fieldwork hasn’t helped at all.

  This story has been stolen from Royal Road. If you read it on Amazon, please report it

  “You are right, I have been a terrible friend for leaving you behind. That wasn’t my intention at all. Shall I plan an outing with all of you?” She asked.

  “What? You aren’t a terrible friend for ignoring the group chat. It’s mostly about Gwen’s baking. This is about you starting your coffee empire without me! Well, don’t you worry; I’ll start my own. With Morkle Mercantile. If you bothered to ask me for my opinion, I would have told you it’s a better option!” He huffed before stomping off.

  What just happened?

  She shook her head; regardless of what he just yelled at her, clearly she has been neglecting her friends. If she had been paying more attention, he would have slept, preventing his feverish, paranoid rampage.

  She failed to adapt to the changing office dynamics. Her friends were no longer on her team, meaning she no longer worked with them and saw them every day. Now that they aren’t spending every workday together, they need to spend time outside of work together, or their friendships will turn to ash.

  She can strike two birds with a single stone.

  She can invite her friends to her dwelling as a test. If any of them are uncomfortable or find something off-putting about her dwelling, she can fix it before she invites Tiv over. She can even offer dirt naps to her friends. None of them have ever really been in her home, let alone had a dirt nap.

  She looked up at the break room and thought against getting a coffee. The urgency of Riv’s explosion and her plan to fix it were enough. Not that she will be working late after all. As Ragna said, it can wait until Monday.

  She pulled out her comms device and found her friend's group chat. There were possibly hundreds of messages that she missed, mostly from Gwen about her baking. It seems everyone was struggling to adjust to the new order of things. Without work, their group chat was stale and nearly forgotten.

  She read through the last messages, starting with Gwen’s dozen or so pictures of a new confection of hers, the Brown-cie. It was a brownie topped with a cookie. The name was still in the works.

  B&B: BEEG would like to try.

  B&B: The name is terrible.

  Gwenn: I already have enough prepared for everyone and will be dropping them off on your desks :) Does anyone know when Keylynn will return?

  Riv: The coffee treason never ceases.

  Dauven: Riv, go to BED! And Gwenn, no, I don’t. She’s working on a Mimic Farm.

  Gwenn: Which means she won’t be checking her comms :(

  Dauven: You can always message her directly.

  Gwenn: No, it’s okay. I don’t want to disturb her.

  Gwen was ingenious when it came to expressing emotions through atypical uses of punctuation. Keylynn has been tempted several times to learn how she thought of such things but always decided to not. If she learned such a skill, Gwen would expect her to use it, and that wasn’t something she was ready for.

  She typed up her invitation before she lost the nerve and put her comms away before she could see a reply.

  Keylynn: Salutations, this is Keylynn. I have survived the Mimic Farm and have been missing my friends dearly. Would you like to visit my dwelling this weekend? I have made space for dirt naps if you would like to try one.

  She has one final thing to do before she can prepare her dwelling for company: to collect slime Eugene from human Eugene’s care. The slime mould were not pleased when she informed them that she would be going on a job while they remained with human Eugene. She felt terrible, but she didn’t know how they would react to The Mimic Farm. It was what was best for everyone. Her slime mould couldn’t be left alone, and they couldn’t come along.

  She stepped into the elevating chamber and pressed the button for the records department. The records department was located under the finance department in the subterranean levels of the office, which happened to be the most secure. Another security measure was that there was only one access point into the entirety of the records department.

  Below the main floor of the records department were the many floors that contain all of the Royal Assessment Department and Adventurer Welfare Council’s records from the inception of the company to present day. The company still stores most of their files in hard copy format for long storage, as it’s harder to damage or lose them.

  She handed the security officer her ID card and waited for them to check her authorization level. The tall dark green orc man handed her ID back with a nod after a moment. He then led her to the records department elevating chamber and set the location for the ADD department office.

  She found human Eugene’s desk easily enough from his desk detritus. He had various vials and flasks from his various hobbies, including desk yogurt, bread goo, and elven wine fermentation. Sitting in the middle of his desk was the large round fishbowl that housed slime Eugene. Inside, the bright mucus-yellow slime undulated gently.

  “There you are, slime Eugene, I have missed you terribly,” she crooned gently as she reached down with one of her hands to touch them. They leaned away from her. She expected them to be irate, but avoiding her was new.

  She crouched in front of the fishbowl. “You know, I didn’t want to leave you here. There were hundreds of mimics, and that, I think, would have been too much for you. I did miss you every day. There was this atrocious coffee that I wanted to see your opinions of.” If her slime mould could huff, they did.

  “Would you like to come home with me? We have to prepare our dwelling for a visit.”

  A pseudopod poked out of the slime mould and looked at her.

  “Oh, yes. And I’m going to need your help, as I have never had guests over before. All of my friends will be coming, and Riv in particular is concerning. You remember how he used to get when he refused to sleep? Well, he is well past the week mark. I place him at two or three weeks,” she explained calmly, keeping her hands to herself.

  The pseudopod stretched itself over the lip of the fishbowl and leaned closer to her. She smiled. She has their attention. She told slime Eugene everything that happened with Riv when she arrived in the office. By the time she was done with her story, slime Eugene was oozing up and down her arm affectionately.

  She stroked the slime mould gently. “You have grown larger if I’m not mistaken, and I think you can differentiate between your emotions and the emotions of others if I’m not mistaken.” The slime mould preened at her praise.

  On their way home she told slime Eugene everything about The Mimic Farm, leaving nothing out. She connected her hyphae to them so that they could experience everything that she did, including the absorption of various mimics. They showed her everything they experienced, including learning how to make faces with human Eugene and experiencing the emotions of a new collection of people.

  Tentatively she was forgiven.