I was worried it would be hard to find the rock I’d found st time, the ohat looked like it could have once had something of a “nose.” But Xy’s sense of dire was uny, and her squirrels helped her find things.

  The pass worked. I don’t know if it poio a north pole, but it pointed in the same dire all the time, and I was able to make a better map. I could probably find my way bay own, which was important to me.

  It took another hour after log the rock to find the cave. It wasn’t much, just a cra the ground, really. But when we found it Enash reized it instantly.

  That’s it! Power is at haher that or a horrible death being mutited by zombies. Well, anything is better than being the captive of an inpetent weakling.

  Having you in my head is no piic, either, I thought of saying, but it seemed uo help matters. I wondered if he was lurio a trap.

  “I’ll go first,” Gren said.

  I shook my head. “I should go. This is for me. I’d expect you to take the bigger risks for your vilge, and Xy for her forest.”

  Even though Gren was bigger, I didn’t doubt that she could get down there if I could. She retty skinny, other than up top.

  “I’ll keep watch up here,” Xy said. And she walked into a tall oak tree, and disappeared.

  rick. She probably made a hell of a gueril warrior, as long as she was in her forest.

  I took my pho of my backpad used it as a fshlight to peer into the crack.

  “What is that?” Gren asked, croug down with me.

  “It’s easiest to just say that it’s magic.”

  “The easy way is often not the best way.”

  “But sometimes it’s best to go with it,” I replied. I couldn’t see much. There was more cave down there, but I didn’t see any zombies milling around, which might be bad news if it meant that the treasure had already been pilged, or that Enash was lying to me. heless, it looked fairly safe.

  I tied a harness around my hips with some rope from my backpack, and then used another rope to attach that to a tree. Not the ohat Xy had melded with, as amusing as it might be to tie her up sometime. Then, I slid into the cra the earth, one hand on the rope, one hand on my saw, and feeling a bit like I ying Tomb Raider.

  The cave mouth is kind of like a pussy, don’t you think?

  I wasn’t thinking it, and now that he’d mentio, I didn’t want to.

  I didn’t he rope, as it turned out. There were rocks I could scramble on if I wao get back out, and the floor of the cave was o feet or so below the fissure. I shone my light around. Curved stone enclosed me all about, but in one dire there ening.

  Gren nded on her feet o me, her bow ready and an arrow iher hand.

  “Might have waited for my signal,” I suggested, untying the hip harness.

  “No zombies,” she said.

  “No.”

  I took a headmp out of my pack, and strapped it on, turning it on. It had e in useful before for fiddling tasks inside dark closets, but I’d never used it in a cave. I flicked it on.

  “Nice,” she said. “You’re a light mage, then?”

  Hahahaha!

  “ly.”

  “I’ll go first,” Gren said.

  “I have the light, and you have a ranged on. I go first,” I said firmly. Did I want to? Hell no. But it made the most sense.

  “What is that thing, anyway?” she asked, pointing to the saw.

  “Think of it kind of like a sword,” I told her. “It makes some hough, so don’t be startled.” I wasn’t going to demonstrate, just in case the noise alerted something that didn’t notice the light. Cautiously, I crept forward, letting my mp show the way. Gren nocked an arrow.

  The cave narrowed, then widened again. It seemed quiet.

  As quiet as a tomb. Although it smelled really, really bad, like a steak fotten in the fridge. I only had that happen once, but I’d never fet the smell.

  I crept forward.

  “Watch out!” Gren shouted, just as I’d noticed myself. What I thought were rocks urities in the floor suddenly rose up. There were four of them, grey, shambling figures. Flesh fell off their bodies wheood, revealing naked bone in spots. They each held a rge metal club.

  I had to bite back the urge to throw up. They possibly hadn’t moved in eons. Well, at least this was ahat didn’t make me wonder what I should do. The dead should not move. I turned on the saw.

  They should have all goer one of us, but I guess zombies aren’t master tactis. Two of them went fren, who was still twenty feet back. And whatever primitive instincts guided them probably led them to think that a on being held fairly still without obvious sharp edges wasn’t very dangerous. In fact, the first one decided to simply bat the saw aside.

  Its arm fell to the ground with a thump. I shifted my on and sawed right through his torso.

  I had to dodge out of the way while the other one swung his club at me, and it still caught my arm. They were a little on the slow side, but he was basically swinging a steel baseball bat. If it ected solidly, it was going to break bones, and the bone he’d been going for had been my skull, which meant that my arm only got a nasty bruising side swipe of a blow that tur numb.

  I couldn’t parry with my saw. It wasn’t desigo hit metal, and would probably break, with little shards going everywhere. And it was fair to say that it wasn’t a on designed fility, either.

  Gren had fired two shots with a bow and now had her k. The arrows had stuck, but they didn’t seem to do much.

  Dimensiohe zombie’s sed swing, which would have e crashing down on my head, cttered against the ground as I disappeared. I reappeared right behind one of the ones menag Gren. The demonic ability didn’t ge the dire I was fag, and I had to pivot just slightly to run my saw through its midse.

  It colpsed in two pieces.

  “Holy crap!” Gren yelled, proving that some cepts cross all cultural boundaries. I think she was talking about the saw, but almost at the same instant the momentum of the zombies swing carried its club int. I was relieved not to hear any splintering bones. She parried another metal club with her knife, and then swung at the abomination’s neck. Its head lolled, but it was still moving.

  I thought she could probably mahe rest, and turned just in time. I hadn’t gotten far enough away from the zombie that had been after me, and as I turned my saw hit his club. The saw kicked back from the tad jerked out of my hand. I khe was all messed up now anyway. I dove to the side, and narrowly missed losing a nipple because I wasn’t used to dodging so as to get my boobs out of the way. I’d hit nails before, which sucked, but nothing like a metal bar being swung at me with force.

  Dimension Step. I was onless, and I wasn’t stig around for another blow, even if I didn’t kly where I should go. The zombie hung on to its club somehow. It turned around until it fou the far edge of the cave, which probably wasn’t hard given that I had a light bulb attached to my head, and charged in my dire. Well, fi least that took time. The zombie on Gren was just filing blindly, and she ducked in and us swing and cut its he rest of the way off.

  Its head fell to the floor first, and then the rest of its rotting body.

  Dimension Step. I moved to where the halves of the first zombie I’d cut in two y and grabbed its metal club. The remaining zombie whirled to face me again. But the odds had ged from two against four to two against one. I just had to not screw up, which given that I didn’t know what I was doing and had no training, wasn’t necessarily going to be easy. But I could Dimensio least five more times.

  I didn’t o. Gren moved behind it, and it paid no attention to her as it fixated on me. I backed up slowly, getting ready to try to parry its club with mihey met in a jarring etal, although at least this csh didn’t involve a power tool. Still, I felt it in my hands, and was remihat my left arm wasn’t happy, either. I hung on.

  Gren sshed through its spine, and it seemed to bance precariously for a moment before finally topping to the floor of the cave.

  “Two each!” Gren said.

  “But who’s ting?” I said weakly.

  “I am,” Gren said, clearly w why I was fused about that.

  She was limping, although trying to hide it. I did a quick look around, looking for more enemies but also making sure that the dead stayed dead. They’d already proven they were fuzzy on that cept, and I wasn’t sure they weren’t going to move just because they’d been cut in two. But no, it seemed we’d won.

  I also hadn’t gotten an experieification for it, which was annoying, but I was happy to be alive. When the saw hit the club, I had freaked out a little. But I gave myself credit. I’d stayed in the fight a being useful. And really, not mu my life had prepared me for zombies with metal clubs trying to kill me.

  And now, a nicely built woman in skimpy leather was looking at me with admiration. “You move so fast. I could hardly even see you move. Su amazing woman. And when that short skirt flounces up, it’s so distrag.”

  I grinned. “You were pretty awesome yourself,” I told her.

  She made a face. “My arrows were useless. I hit them right in the eye, and they kept ing. Zombies.” She spat on the ground.

  “I knht?” I said.

  The cave went deeper. My arm was sore, but funal, and I’d lost my main advah the saw. Maybe we should turn back. I wasn’t sure what the oute would be if we fought anroup, or how effective a club would be against the undead. “How’s y?”

  “Bruised, I think. It’ll hurt worse tomorrow. I tinue. Let’s get what we came for.”

  There might not be any muardians.

  Might. “I repair my sarobably heal up some if we go back. Anht like that and I don’t know what would happen.” Although maybe a saw wasn’t such a great on, after all. Maybe I o get a sword, and I suspected I could just go buy one, ba Earth. I’d just have to tell someone I inteo hang it up on the wall, rather than actually use it.

  Kidding! There aren’t any. Go ohe wand. It’s in the chamber.

  To give him his due, he’d pyed fairly straight with me about the cave so far. And there was a danger in Gren knowing about it, especially if it was now unguarded. I thought I could trust her, but I didn’t have great reasons, and I knew I had a prejudice for attractive women. Femme body or no, that hadn’t ged a bit. But I didn’t think she’d stop at much to rescue her father, and I didn’t know that I could bme her for that.

  “We go back if you want,” Gren said. “But as I said, it’ll stiffen up tomorrow and be worse. What is this thing, anyway?” She gestured at the saw, but was clear she didn’t want to get too close to it, even though the auto shut-off meant that it was no longer whirring. “saw, you said?”

  “Yeah. It’s really not meant to be a on. More of a rept for an axe or a saw, really. But it’s what I had.”

  “It was brutal,” she said with admiration. “But it’s broken?”

  “It’ll o be fixed, yes. Alright, let’s go on.”

  Gren smiled. “I love a woman with ce. Seeing you fight made me wet.”

  Alrighty then. Knowing she was horny made me a little horny, too, but I wasn’t going to get it on with her in the middle of a cave that might still have zombie guardians in it. “Let’s talk about that whe out.”

  “I accept your promise, Abby of the whirring on,” she said.

  “It wasn’t a promise, just a suggestion.”

  “Okay, she whose bottom bounces bountifully.”

  She really liked her alliteration.

  We kept going deeper into the cave, with me leading. How much did the skirt flip up, anyway? I thought it was long enough, but I suppose bat was a different issue. I wasn’t fshing Gren just by walking ahead of her, was I?

  And if I was, did I really mind?